Most people value honesty. They want to tell the truth. They also value kindness. Sometimes, though, honesty and kindness collide. That happens when telling the truth would be hurtful, but being kind involves telling a lie. How do people negotiate this clash of noble intentions? When the Truth Hurts: Lying to Be Kind is a brief book with two parts. Part 1 is adapted from this chapter: DePaulo, Bella M., Morris, Wendy L., & Sternglanz, R. Weylin (2009). When the truth hurts: Deception in the name of kindness. In Anita L. Vangelisti (Ed.), Feeling hurt in close relationships (pp. 167-190). Cambridge: Cambridge University Press. In Part 2, questions that various reporters have asked Professor DePaulo over the years are collected and answered. Professor Bella DePaulo is an award-winning social scientist and Harvard Ph.D. who has been studying the psychology of deceiving and detecting deceit for decades. She is one of the most renowned scholars in the field. Dr. DePaulo's previous books on deception include Behind the Door of Deceit, The Hows and Whys of Lies, The Lies We Tell and the Clues We Miss, Is Anyone Really Good at Detecting Lies (with Charles F. Bond, Jr.), and The Psychology of Dexter. Bella DePaulo is also an expert on single life and has published Singled Out, Single with Attitude, and Singlism.
About the Author: Bella DePaulo (PhD, Harvard) is one of the leading scholars of the psychology of deceiving and detecting deceit. She has authored more than 100 scholarly publications. Her expertise on topics such as the psychology of deception and single life has been recognized in the New York Times, the Washington Post, USA Today, the Wall Street Journal, and many other major national and international newspapers. Her work has also been reported in magazines such as Time, Newsweek, The Week, AARP Magazine, the Economist, the Atlantic, More, the New York Times Magazine, and the New Yorker. Her op-ed essays have appeared in publications such as the New York Times, the Chronicle of Higher Education, and Forbes. Dr. DePaulo has discussed her work on ABC, NBC, CBS, CNN, CNBC, PBS, the BBC, and the Discovery Channel. She has lectured nationally and internationally, addressing such diverse groups as medical professionals, forensic scientists, school teachers, criminal attorneys, physicists, judges, women's centers, and mental health practitioners. Dr. DePaulo writes the "Living Single" blog for Psychology Today, and is also a contributor to the Huffington Post. She has been a Visiting Professor of Psychology at the University of California, Santa Barbara since the summer of 2000. Much more information about her background, her books, and her contact information can be found at her website, www.BellaDePaulo.com.