Building on Dewey's philosophy of experience, our personal and professional lived
experiences are mutually informing. Thus, personal illness experiences may impact how we
engage in professional roles. In this self-study, using Connelly and Clandinin's Narrative
Inquiry, I explore my experience of an eating disorder as an adolescent, and how this experience
informs my nursing practice today. I crafted stories of my illness experience often using poetic
prose. I analyzed these using the three levels of justification (personal, practical, social) through
the theoretical lens of Erikson's psychosocial stages of development. Four narrative threads
(impulsivity: response to losing control, lack of autonomy, liminality, lack of meaningful
relationships) emerged and coalesced into three narrative patterns (control, belonging, identity).
This self-study provides healthcare professionals an understanding of the impact a stigmatized
illness may have on one's professional role. My intention is to inspire others to enter their own
inquiry into their experiences of illness.
