We live in a grief-avoidance society and the sensitive topics of death and grief are still the elephant in the room. Death is inevitable and will visit every household at some point, but because it's not required learning, such as CPR, the 911 system, emergency evacuation, and the like, we are unfamiliar and unprepared to deal with it when it knocks on the door. We don't know what to say or what not to say to someone who is grieving the loss of a dear love one. In most cases, we say all the wrong things, such as "I understand how you feel."

This unscheduled event has placed itself on your calendar, crossed your doorstep, and entered your home without permission. You can't change, delete, postpose, reschedule, or evict it. It doesn't discriminate against race, creed, color, religion, nationality, gender, age, sexual orientation or cause of death. It grants you membership into a club that you never asked to join. This inevitable occasion of death has taken possession of the core essence of your existence... now what

How do you accept that life as it was will never be the same again? How do you describe the pain, despair, loneliness to others? Why do people say all the wrong things, such as I understand how you feel, or It just takes time, or You should be over it by now or It was just God's will? Might it make things better if they said nothing at all, or simply I don't know what to say, but I am here for you?

It's a dark and lonely place. A wilderness where you will encounter crooked paths, wrong turns, dead ends, scattered debris, seemingly no way out. How do you find the light, the peace, the comfort that you so desperately seek, or does it even exist? Will the pain ever go away? Will you live, thrive, or love again? Why do we grieve anyway? We grieve because we loved. To grieve is not selfish, as many might indicate. It is the normal and natural response to loss. It is your own personal, unique response to the love that you shared with your loved one.

Dora Carpenter says that just like the cocoon's tenacity and perseverance causes the transformation to a beautiful butterfly, so can you. She says it doesn't have to take many years to be held hostage and victim to the emotional, physical, and spiritual pain of unresolved grief. No, life as it was will never be the same again, but life going forward matters, it counts, and you have an obligation to live it for the rest of your life. If you choose to do the work, you can find meaning and purpose in your life going forward.

What is this thing called the grief work, the new normal, the renewal, the rebirth? Dora Carpenter's grief coaching model helps you navigate the grief journey so that you can move from pain to peace, heartbreak to happiness, and grief to gratitude in the shortest time possible. She inspires and empowers you to live a fulfilled life of meaning and purpose while creating the legacy that you will be remembered for. She says, "Embrace all that life has to offer you, celebrate each baby step along the way, and find gratitude in the gift of now.

From Grief to Gratitude: We Grieve Because We Loved is written for those grieving the loss of a loved one as well as those supporting others who are grieving. The author shares her personal and death care industry experience and coach training to address this diminished, often silenced topic. A recommended resource for every household.

"Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, it became a butterfly." - Anonymous