The authors wrote this book for one purpose: to teach family members and friends of people with substance abuse issues a specific set of skills that will help them survive the stress loving an addict creates in their lives. The authors share with the reader ways to deal with the fear, anger, helplessness, and the conflict they may experience in their attempts to both help the addicted family member and protect themselves from them as well. Most books in this genre focus on how to "fix" the addict. They assume that getting the addict into a treatment program is the final solution to the problem. The authors of this book know from experience that there is no quick fix for addiction. Recovery from addiction is a lifelong project. For this reason, this book focuses on (1) providing accurate and useful information about addiction; and (2) teaching the specific skills that are essential for family members to learn and practice. What do family members need to know, what do they need to do, and how can they go about learning and doing those things? This book systematically explains how to create and maintain healthy boundaries, how to work effectively as a team, how to find and use appropriate support, how to improve communication with the addicted member and other family members, and other valuable skills that lead to a better quality of life. This book is for families to help themselves over a lifetime, regardless of whether their addicted member ever gets help, gets help and relapses, or gets help and stays clean and sober. The skills that enable the family to improve its quality of life in the face of addiction turn out to be the same skills that provide the addict an optimal environment for recovery. The emphasis throughout is on you, the family member or friend of the addict. When addiction enters a family, the whole family embarks on a journey. This book is a unique guide for individuals or groups who want to learn the skills and behaviors essential for negotiating that path with the best chance for a positive outcome.
About the Author: The three authors combine professional credentials and expertise with decades of personal experience learning to live full and happy lives in spite of serious addictions in their families. Robert H. Brown, LCSW, MPH, was the child of alcoholic parents, both of whom died during his teen years. He enlisted in the Air Force, where he began a career in drug and alcohol counseling that would become his life work. After he left the Air Force, he completed his education, graduating from the University of Hawaii with a Master's degree in Public Health and a Master's degree in Social Work. He worked for the Department of Veterans Affairs for thirty years, counseling veterans with post-traumatic stress and substance abuse issues. He developed and taught classes for family members concerned about their loved ones' drug and alcohol use. Bob has been married for thirty-five years and enjoys traveling with his wife, Sue, visiting their children and grandchildren. His interests include hiking, Tai Chi, and oil painting. Dr. Patrick L. Brown was appointed by the Governor of Hawaii to both the Hawaii Council for Mental Health and the Oahu Service Area Board for Mental Health and Substance Abuse, which he chairs. His professional experience includes administration of the Civilian Employee Assistance Program for employees with substance abuse and/or mental health issues at Pearl Harbor Naval Shipyard. Margaret E. Brown, MA, and her husband Patrick struggled for years trying to help a son whose life was being destroyed by addiction. they discovered Bob Brown's class at Hina Mauka Treatment Center and applied the skills taught in that class. Learning and applying those skills had such a positive impact on their lives and on the life of their son (who has now been sober for three years) that they decided to join Bob in writing this book to pass along the knowledge and skills to others suffering in similar situations.