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This book includes 2 manuscripts by Lana Otoya:
Signs of Emotional Abuse: Finding the Line Between Acceptable Human Behavior and Abuse
Rumination: Learn To Overcome Your Destructive Thoughts and Start Thinking Positively (Fight Anxiety and Stress)
This book will help you diagnose whether or not you are in an emotionally abusive relationship and provide you with the tools to repair your mental health, by helping with Rumination/overthinking and teach you how to start thinking positively again.
Signs of Emotional Abuse:
What is the line between emotional abuse and normal human behavior?;
Why is it that so many people find their way into relationships like this? The answer isbecause it's nearly impossible to see abuse from the inside.
I made it a mission of mine to find out exactly how to diagnose an abusive relationship from inside a relationship, so that anyone going through abuse or trauma can find a way out.
Understanding Why It's Difficult to Pin Point Emotional Abuse
Abusive behavior can be hard to define or prove and many people think that abuse is an "opinion".
I know a couple where the man is emotionally abused by the woman. I have often heard his friends say things like "well if she makes him happy then it's ok", or "if he's ok with it then I guess it's alright."
If you were saying these things about your own relationship you might say "yeah, but I don't mind it when he does that" or "but I know she doesn't mean it that way". You are saying these thingsas if abuse is an opinion-based thing when it really isn't.
There is a line that changes things and moves behavior over into the abuse category and you do not get to determine where that line is.Abuse is not an opinion.
This book will show you when behavior turns into abuse.
Rumination:
Does the idea of thinking positively sound like the devil inviting you into the depths of hell?
Those of us who suffer from anxiety, depression and rumination know that "thinking positively" is easier said than done. We reject it by rolling our eyes and dismissing the idea because for some reason, it just doesn't feel good to think positively.
Why is it that your mind is rejecting an idea that you know is probably good for you?
The answer is the path of least resistance.
Your Brain Is Like A City With Roads
In your city, you have positive buildings (aka positive thoughts) and negative buildings (negative thoughts). Every time you think negatively, you build a road to a negative building. Every time you think positively, you build a road to a positive building.
If you're always thinking about negative things, the roads leading to your negative buildings will be nicely paved highways with no speed limit. They will be your paths of least resistance.
Then, someone like me (hello!) comes a long and says "you should think positively" which means, you should go to a positive building in Brain City.
You'll think about that for a moment and then realize... the roads to the positive buildings are no good! They are the path of maximum resistance because you haven't spent any time building those roads.
If you are depressed, anxious or suffer from rumination, your roads to positive buildings are not fun to drive on.This Book Will Teach You To Build Positive Roads