The church does some really weird things when it comes to dating.
You might have done some of them. Courtship, purity rings, contracts, and emotional virginity. If you're a serial dater, you've given away "pieces of your heart." If you pray together, you've committed the sin of prayer-sex. And if you've crossed the line, you're doomed forever to leftovers.
But for those of us who have already "crossed the line" - is it too late for us? Are these ideas hurting more than helping? And can the church offer anything more than guilt-trips for sex and dating?
A bizarre subculture of "Christianese dating" has sprung up with really bad advice on all sides. Scare tactics and Bible-shaming have resulted in a panicked paranoia and guilt about sex, but the backlash to Christianese dating has borne a resentful subculture of its own. This tension has caught unwitting Christians in the crossfire of confusion.
The church is either bashing sex, or bashing others who bash sex.
How can we find the core truth about relationships amidst this reactionary cycle?
How can we balance between Hollywood-shallow romance and a restrictive prison of fear?
And what about real wisdom for break-ups, heartbreak, lust, pornography, singles, struggling couples, and those navigating the consequences of their sexual regrets?
"The Christianese Dating Culture" starts from scratch about God's heart for us in our relationships. It pulls away the layers of passive-aggressive teaching on dating and asks the bigger questions. It talks about Joshua Harris and courtship and "I Kissed Dating Goodbye." It gets personal, about a suicide attempt over a girl and a fifteen year porn addiction. It answers real questions from real people about the gritty, weird, embarrassing endeavor of dating. By dismantling the problematic ideologies of the Christianese church subculture, we can journey together towards the kind of church that Jesus died for - the ultimate romance that transforms us.
