Every parent lives with the unspeakable fear of the loss of a child. Life holds no greater indignity than that of a parent who outlives their child. When the unspeakable happens, the rising tide and waves of grief seem unsurvivable. This book is a firsthand account of a mother whose son was tragically killed in an accident and her journey through that unbearable grief.
This unflinching look at how a parent's reality is forever changed after the death of a child is both heartbreaking and hopeful. The grieving will recognize themselves in many places and feel less alone in their loss.
Everyone's grief is unique and so will their journey be through that grief. This example of one mother's path will bring hope to the grieving that they can find theirs.
FROM THE AUTHOR
PROLOGUE JULY 19, 1997
My son died tragically.
At first it was just raw pain, and writing was something I could do with that pain in the dark night hours. I'd walk the floor, crying, stifling the moans, rocking and holding myself, then put some words on paper. My daughter found the beginnings of the journal and said, "You should write, Mom, but don't write about Marc." I prowled libraries, looking for a book about my experience. I wanted to be with another woman who had lost a son, walk with her in the solitude, let her explain it to me, help me make sense of it. I never found the book.
WHAT OTHERS ARE SAYING
In The Blue Balloon: Journey Through Grief, Sally Mathews takes us down a path that all parents fear. She shares her reflections on losing her 19-year-old son, Marc, as he approached manhood. While this journey belongs to Sally and her family, she is not the only one who has travelled this path. This story is a painful yet remarkable testament to the deepest love and the darkest loss that one could ever experience. Children should never die before their parents. That is not the natural order of things.
There are many of books about the immeasurable and intense grief of losing a child. Most first person accounts are sensitive and often prescriptive. Sally's story doesn't tell us what to do or how to feel. Instead, she lets us in on her personal and very private journey that may teach us more than any clinical or religious application.
It has taken Sally 30 years to tell her story and it is told with grace and grit. Through her tears and pain, Sally models hope, purpose and what is possible in the face of such loss.
This is a significant book that is beautifully illustrated with elegant pen and ink drawings by Carole Jo Dennis, Marc's sister and Sally's daughter, and with watercolors by artist Janice McMurray.
The Blue Balloon is a warm, sensitive and hopeful story that will resonate with parents who have taken their own journey of loss and yet it is accessible to those who wish to understand. It should be read by anyone who has lost a child or knows someone who has.
-Anthony G. Butto, DSW, LCSW, QCSW
Director of The Courtyard Counseling Center
Selinsgrove, PA
The Blue Balloon is a stunningly beautiful evocation of Sally Mathews' process in the aftermath of her son's death. -Catherine McLaughlin, M.ED., Licensed Psychologist
About the Author: Sally Mathews grew up on the plains of northern Iowa, where there was everything a young person could desire. At Millikin University in Decatur, Illinois she practiced the piano conscientiously until something unexpected intervened - opportunity to attend an international workcamp on Ishigaki Island, the southern tip of the Ryukyu Islands of Japan. Workcamps were organized worldwide by Quakers and were probably the model for John F. Kennedy's Peace Corps. The experience turned her world topsy-turvy just before her senior year. However, with much chaos and turbulence, she managed to graduate cum laude with a degree, Bachelor of Music Education. Graduate studies brought her east for another unexpected turn. While teaching junior- senior high school music, she married the social studies teacher. Years of teaching public school music (with a special interest in children's choirs) commingled with raising a family. Fortunately, both children, Carole Jo and Marc, sang in her children's choirs. After her son's death Sally volunteered and later joined the staff at Emmaus, Services for the Aging in Washington, D. C. A class in journaling at Foundry United Methodist Church was the genesis of The Blue Balloon. Shalem, Church of the Saviour and Wesley Theological Seminary further enriched that time of healing and growth. A three-year sojourn at Kirkridge Retreat Center brought Sally and her husband, John, to Lewisburg, Pennsylvania, an historic town nestled in the hills of Amish and Mennonite farmland. Sally serves on the Board of Directors for Oasis, Ministries for Spiritual Development. She graduated from its program, Spiritual Direction for Spiritual Guides, in 2009. Currently, she enjoys an Oasis class, Contemplative Living, The Spirituality of Daily Life. BILL courses (Bucknell Institute for Lifelong Learning), reading, gardening, concerts, and good friends keep the days pleasant and fulfilling.
